


Hiding the Truth

by TheBigLoserQueen



Series: Mutant AU [21]
Category: Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: AU, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Mutants, Angst, F/M, Het, Human, Implied Sexual Content, Light Angst, Mutants, Tension, Unresolved Emotional Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-24
Updated: 2019-07-24
Packaged: 2020-07-19 05:34:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19968859
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBigLoserQueen/pseuds/TheBigLoserQueen
Summary: Bloodshed worried about Thornstriker finding out the truth.





	Hiding the Truth

Bloodshed was unable to sleep, but he really didn’t mind much. It was a peaceful night, and tomorrow was Sunday, so he didn’t have to worry about going to work. It wasn’t that big of a deal if he woke up a little later, he didn’t need to worry about that. 

Instead, he gently ran his fingers through Thornstriker’s hair as she slept next to him. He had come over to her apartment again, and she had asked him if he wanted to spend the night. He didn’t think twice before saying yes.

It had been a simple night, just having dinner together and watching a documentary on the discovery channel. Then she had gone to take a shower. For whatever reason, he had been feeling a little bold that night and asked if he could join her. She sheepishly agreed.

Then he asked if it was all right if they had sex. She agreed to that too.

That had been hours ago though. Now, with it being two in the morning, Thornstriker was dead asleep while he lay beside her, stroking her hair. Her cheeks were still a little red, and she was completed naked underneath the covers. She looked so cute… Carefully, not wanting to wake her, Bloodshed leaned down to kiss her temple.

Thankfully, she didn’t stir. With a small breath of relief, he moved to lie back down next to her. He continued to play with her hair, the motion bringing him a sense of comfort. Her hair was so soft, and it was cute to see it curl up when she was sleeping. Once morning cam, he knew she would be embarrassed by her messy bedhead. She thought she looked silly, but he always thought it was adorable. He wished he could see it every morning, not just when he slept over.

He took his hand away, turning to lie on his back. It was something he really wanted, but a part of him made him hesitate. Even when Thornstriker had asked him if he wanted to move in together, he hadn’t been able to give a straight answer. Obviously, of course he did; it was just another step closer to spending the rest of his life together with the woman he loved.

But he was afraid. Despite being together for two years now, despite knowing what kind of woman she was, he was still afraid that she would find out the truth and that she would reject him for it. He knew she wasn’t a prejudiced person, he knew she was thought mutants were no different from everyone else. Primus, she worked with them on a regular basis! She had nothing against them.

That didn’t mean she wanted to date a mutant, especially not one who had such dangerous powers, even more so when he was not in control of himself. They were powers even he hated, something he kept hidden under all costs. He didn’t want her to know that about him. He didn’t want her to see him as a monster, he didn’t want her to hate him…

It seemed stupid. And maybe it was. Thornstriker wasn’t a hateful person, everyone knew that. She didn’t believe that mutants were dangerous by default. She was friends with some. He had ever heard her stand up to those who would try to talk badly about them! She probably wouldn’t have minded that much if she knew her boyfriend was a mutant too.

He just couldn’t let go of that fear though. What if she asked about his powers? What if she wanted to see them? What if she became afraid of them, and of him? There was also the possibility of people treating her differently, poorly even, if they knew she was dating a mutant. He didn’t want to have her suffer because of him. Not like how his mother had suffered.

He turned on his side to look at her again. Primus, she looked so peaceful and sweet like this… He didn’t want her to get hurt. And he didn’t want to be hurt either.

But It made him feel guilty for lying to her about his identity. It was like he couldn’t trust her, even though he loved her with his entire being. But that fear of her rejection wouldn’t go away, and it was keeping him from being honest with the one woman he never wanted to lie to

He didn’t deserve to even be with her, let alone move in with her. He couldn’t even tell her everything about himself, unlike her, where she was so open and honest… He was a coward. He shouldn’t be allowed to move forward in this relationship with her if he couldn’t be honest about who he was.

Letting out a heavy huff, he wrapped his arms gently around her and pulled her into his chest. Thornstriker didn’t stir, but she snuggled up into his chest, a small smile coming to her face. She was just so cute…

He leaned down to kiss the top of her head. He knew he needed to tell her the truth one day. He couldn’t hide this from her forever, not if he wanted to stay with her. Thornstriker was a good woman who was honest him and so many others; she deserved someone who was just as equally true to her. He didn’t know when that day would be, and he was terrified to think of what could happen when that day came, but he had to do it. He had to be honest.

But not now. He had to tell her when he was ready, when things were right. He didn’t just want to spring it on her, and he didn’t want her finding out from someone else. He wanted to be the one to tell her the truth. Which was even more terrifying to think about, but he had to do it. He had to, if he wanted to be with her.

As the anxiety started eating at him, he looked back down at her face. Her gentle expression slowly relaxed him, causing him to hold her closer. Even though he was afraid of her rejecting him, at least he knew now that she was with him. He knew she loved him now.

And that was enough to help him fall asleep.


End file.
